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I recently learned that a woman we had not seen in several years had died. In mid-life, she had decided the most important thing to her was to be submissive to a man and be paddled for breaking rules she thought were important.

She divorced her husband. Her two late teen boys moved in with their Dad. All she wanted was her freedom and a small house. Freedom. Free to live as another man required her.

She was a delightful person. We did not have a spanking relationship. Nor would I have wanted one. We spent some weekends parkng our RV at her home on the Gulf Coast nd eating seafood and yakking.

When we first knew her, her Dom was long distance. If she broke a rule, he had a local man paddle her. Later her Dom was a like a traveling minister. He would travel between all his submissives, staying a week or so with each and give them sore bottoms. No sex.

We have known several other women who have done the same thing.

I think a irrational need to be submissive is a form of mental illness. Men or Women.

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I find it equally odd that men will seek to Dom women from a distance. Sometimes never meeting face-to-face. Men with families that take considerable time to talk with their sub daily.

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Regular readers know we are both alpha types. Sometimes, Bacall will want to be submissive. She tells me the day before exactly what she wants and works her mind into becoming that submissive. I call it being bedroom submissive. Bondage helps get her “her mind right”. I have became experienced in trigger words and sentences that help her settle in. When released she always does a particular sex act. One that means submission to her. She never does it any other time. She would if I asked, but I reserve it for her special use.

As soon as our play session is over she is back to doing what she wants, how she wants, when she wants.

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Many thanks for the several dozen Get Well notes. I would like to acknowledge all, but that is not in the cards.
One loyal reader sent a note along with the photo. Bacall being female locked onto her Swede shoes matching her hose.
Sorry the ‘f*ckin leukemia’ is being a jerk again. Hopefully that will subside soon and your energy will return to more enjoyable levels.
Until then, since you’re spending all that time in bed anyways? Thought I’d send you some extra company to spend it with… enjoy.
It turned out the Leukemia is not the cause. In fact my blood counts have improved for the third month without treatment. But I am getting ahead of the story.
While waiting the see the doc I was feeling increasing faint. I asked to lay down and as soon as I did I blacked out, had muscle spasms, my eyes rolled back and I vomited the once of fruit drink I had.
I woke up to see seven white lab coats looking distressed. They did an EKG and it was abnormal. They called the paramedics and soon they were seven broad chested guys dressed in black on black with steely expressions. Expressions that told me nothing about what they were thinking. They were all combat medics. They has seen mangled bodies, patched up battle wounds, and comforted a soldier in his last minutes.
Guessing it could be my heart they took me an ER in town.
The ER doc I had was a crusty old bird who knew her shit. She ran a half dozen tests came up dry. This left sleep apea. I have not worked up rested in over a year. Maybe time to tweak the settings on the machine?

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A reader sent me a link to the question of the week blog. He noted how different the views of the commenters were from the content on OBB. (OK, I know the content here is all over the place, but it’s always about spanking is fun and erotic and never about punishment) 

The question:

Are spankees defiant, bratty or recalcitrant initially, throughout, or until the discipline sinks in? Or are they apologetic and remorseful from the outset?

Around here we are damn happy to get spanked. Never defiant, apologetic or remorseful.

How to get spanked around here. Ask How about a spanking?

I am going to bind and blindfold you and then paddle your caboose.

I am going to take you into the closet and use a belt on you.

Anyway, you decide. https://hermionesheart.blogspot.com/2024/07/spanko-brunch-20-550.html

I think this picture tells my story. There are few pictures like it.

I am rigid, before, during and after a padding. Bacall is just as excited, but not visually so.

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A few people give parties, most are goers. Some goers are wall flowers, never drawing attention to themselves.

Most men that are interested in spanking, have never spanked. It reminds me of the lyrics Robert Hunter wrote 55 years ago.

Most of the cats that you meet on the streets speak of true love,
Most of the time they’re sittin’ and cryin’ at home.
One of these days they know they better get goin’
Out of the door and down on the streets all alone.

Truckin’, like the do-dah man.
Once told me “You’ve got to play your hand”
Sometimes your cards ain’t worth a dime if you don’t lay’em down.

Many come to OBB as ghosts. Too timid to engage. I would like to encourage them to step out of their shell. To not fear being outed. I don’t know of a single word I could say to put them on the path to freedom.

I have seen them at commercial parties lurking in the shadows.

It was easy for me to be out. My impulse driven personality allowed me to drive through walls on a whim. It was easy for me to say to a woman “You look like you need a good spanking”. Her reaction was never negative. Not one time. I might not spank her, but she would agree she did need to be spanked and laugh. It might not be me that would spank her. Or maybe it just was not going to happen right then.

You have to start somewhere. Asking a girl to dance when I was 16 was terrifying. Asking a girl if she wanted a spanking at 22 was natural.

Being Outed

Most spanko’s are terrified of being outed. Have you ever been outed? Do you know anyone who was outed? Not rumors, someone you know. I’ll bet you have not known anyone who was outed.

We know of one instance. Us.

Tom was an original member of our spanking group. He lived in our city. He was a deputy sheriff and an all-around good guy.

A year goes by and a gal from Nashville, Kathy, joins our group. She was about 35 and a switch. We invited her to our home for a spanking weekend. It went OK, but I judged her to be a spanking newbie.

Kathy bent over my desk

She told us that she had been married twice (or was it three times) and they all died. They were all civil service, so there was a life insurance pay out and a survivor’s pension. What do you think the odds of losing 2 or 3 husbands in a decade would be?

Tom was also a switch, so he was all over her. That was the last we saw of Kathy. She got a man, got married, and was done with the group. So Tom was another civil service employee she had married. We figured Tom was a goner.

Maybe since she had told us about her prior marriages, she did not kill him, but instead filed for divorce within a year. She told Tom’s daughter all about the spanking going ons.

Here’s where we come in. Tom got the most vicious divorce attorney in the city, Wendy, who was married to Bacall’s business partner. We were at some soirée and Wendy corralled us into a conversation. That was unusual as Wendy was a Brahmin and we were below her social standing. She went on and on about this divorce she was handling. Details that should never have been revealed. Suddenly she started in about Tom knowing D and D. [I am using our initials] It was D and D this and D and D that. Never letting on that she knew it was us. I am sure she told that story a few times with a smug expression.

What happened? Not a damn thing, except Kathy did not get a nickel.

That’s the only outing I know of.

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How Did We Become Fascinated With Bottoms? Like a lot of things, it comes from the Prime Imperative – Procreation.

I saw an X profile where she described herself as Pygophiliac – which is sexual arousal from seeing or touching the buttocks of another person. This led to my Goggling the word  which turned up this from Wikipedia.

In humans, females generally have more round and voluptuous buttocks, caused by estrogen that encourages the body to store fat in the buttocks, hips, and thighs. Testosterone discourages fat storage in these areas. The buttocks in human females thus contain more adipose tissue than in males, especially after puberty. Evolutionary psychologists suggest that rounded buttocks may have evolved as a desirable trait because they provide a visual indication of the woman’s youth and fertility. They signal the presence of estrogen and the presence of sufficient fat stores for pregnancy and lactation. Additionally, the buttocks give an indication of the shape and size of the pelvis, which impacts reproductive capability. Since development and pronunciation of the buttocks begins at menarche and declines with age, full buttocks are also a symbol of youth.[1]

Biological anthropologist Helen B. Fisher said that “perhaps, the fleshy, rounded buttocks attracted males during rear-entry intercourse“.[3] In a 2017 study, using 3D models and eye-tracking technology, Fisher’s claim was tested and was shown that the slight thrusting out of a woman’s back influences how attractive others perceive her to be and captures the gaze of both men and women.[4][5] Bobbi S. Low et al. said that the female buttocks “evolved in the context of females competing for the attention and parental commitment of powerful resource-controlling males” as an “honest display of fat reserves” that could not be confused with another type of tissue, although Tim M. Caro rejected that as being a necessary conclusion, stating that female fatty deposits on the hips improve individual fitness of the female, regardless of sexual selection.[6]

Do ya feel like spanking a bottom? Perhaps procreating Doggy style?

Adm note: Readers have doubled in July. Comments have been almost non-existent this week. You guys are going to have to up your game.

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Before I begin this rant, you should know I have accumulated 173 pictures of schoolgirls.

For every girl that was paddled at school, there have been 3,602,433 pictures taken depicting a schoolgirl being paddled. The pictures don’t reflect reality. They were not paddled on the bare bottom and they did not have their tops removed. A rare event turned into porn.

The number one absurd reason for being paddled in the videos is being late for cheerleader practice.

Implausible: Boobs exposed for a paddling in the school office.

Overdone: Schoolgirl outfits

A lot of women have a short pleated skirt in their closet. They wear them to Halloween parties. They never wore them to school. I don’t get the near universal appeal. 

One woman wrote me: The urge to wear one, I think it’s much greater in those of us into spankings mainly because a skirt and white panties have been ingrained in us as the ‘spanking outfit’ forever. It has become the de facto ‘schoolgirl’ look, and skirts and panties also make it very easy to bare our bottoms, and we usually look rather delightful bent over a desk and bare. Beth

I been talking with a chap across the pond who knows both spanking party organizers and the women who hire out for them. These parties are different from any I have been to. The men pay a fee and get to express their desires of what kind of gals they expect at the party. The organizers are continually overwhelmed with requests for schoolgirls. The models are beyond tired of all that.

At our parties, there were no fees. The gals wore what they pleased. One time they coordinated and wore schoolgirl outfits. Another time it was black lingerie with garterbelt and stockings.

By mentioning black lingerie above, it allows me to insert four examples.

AI gives us more schoolgirls

As she departed from Miss Hart’s study, carrying her skirt and feeling wave after wave of heat pulsing through her smarting bottom, Melissa realized that referring to the P.E. Mistress as a “grumpy old trout” had been a grievous error of judgment!

And while I am on a rant, enough with spankings in the kitchen and bathroom. There are other more appropriate rooms.

A bit of humor from my UK correspondent: Long ago I knew a chap who took delight in telling everyone that his very attractive wife put on a school uniform, which lead to some gentle spanking as a prelude to sex. I always wondered why she never looked embarrassed by the revelation. Clarity dawned when the local press carried a story that this same lady had regular trysts on company premises with several directors of her employer. It involved school uniform, spanking, and the inevitable ‘intimacy’. Was it revenge for his lack of discretion? We never knew. 

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I thought yesterday’s post was one of the best picture posts on OBB. It got some comments, but you guys need to up the ante to keep me inspired. Maybe you want to take another at yesterday’s post?

Sadly, guys seems to be the correct word. I am not aware of any female commenters in the last few months.

A while back a reader crawled me because Bogey and Bacall were liberals. And so they were – like most in Hollywood. I pay no attention to actors’ private lives unless they rub it in my face like Rob Reiner.

Here is a good bio on Bacall

 

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Morning
Have you or Bacall ever sat down and discussed what it is you like? I’ve read over the “How each of  us likes to be paddled” several times and I felt like this was very well thought out. But I wondered how specific your communications were.

We got to our places with many conversations over many years.

 Although I  am very well matched with a spanko wife who is the love of my life, I am not a great communicator when it comes to specifics. ( can you imagine that!!)  It seems a bit odd to me that after 30+ years in the scene, I’ve never actually clarified it.

Some folks get off on dirty talk. I have never been altogether sure of what that means. If it includes saying what you are going to do to the other, we do that. I have done that to probably every gal I have spanked. Occasionally, their eyes will get wide and I can tell she is realizing that I am going to do that which she has silently wanted to happen to her for decades. That’s communication.  Grin

I do it with Bacall. For instance, she is a bedroom bondage fan. I don’t go there more than once a month to keep it fresh. I like to surprise her. When she is bound, I tell her I can do anything I want to her and she will have to take it. The “you have to take it” elicits a swoon.  That’s communication. We know each others hot buttons and like to jump on them. I am gleefully sadistic.
We have learned each other hot buttons by talking about what we want and how we want it. That was hard for me in the beginning. It was always easy for her. I learned I could tell her anything or ask for anything just by following her example.
Second, we normally do a debrief afterward. We say what we liked, and what we want more or less of. [Debrief – Is that a pun?]
We also got comfortable with expressing a change of course mid-session. For instance, asking for a different toy or more licks (or less) for instance.
Backing up to “you have to take it”. It evolved that one of us would sometimes tell the other after the spanking was seemingly over “I want to give you another 10 licks. They are going to be hard. Will you take them for me”. She would say “Do I have to”? I would say yes and she would bend over, push her bottom out, and steel herself for the paddle. That’s submission. She would do me the same way. She would give me a hot bottom and then ask me to take more licks for her. Do it for her. They were always as hard as she could swing. That’s as submissive as I ever got.
She prefers to know she is going to be paddled a day in advance so she has the time to work herself into a submissive mood. She usually sentences herself, telling me that she needs a paddling tomorrow. I tease her the rest of the day that I am going to paddle her in the morning. I think that’s communication.
So yeah, we talk about it before, during and after. You think you guys can do that?
 Also, have you or Bacall ever felt like you need a good paddling to center your emotions, and if yes, Have you found it to be successful.
No, never that. It was helpful to us in our 40’s when we both worked long hours. No time during the week for sex or play. We would force ourselves to spank on Saturday mornings to relieve our tension.
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History Buffs

Dwight Eisenhower talks about D-Day with Walter Cronkite 20 years after. The only time a President ever talked at length about anything that he was not trying to sell you.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vNaxTXfjfXk

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Some people still can not access OBB using non-standard means like incognito mode or  Linux, etc.

Reader Mike reported this, but did not give an email address for a reply.

Caged Lion set this site up. Bless him. I have been a passenger. I don’t know beans about certificates nor why they would prevent a Linux machine from accessing OBB.

You can access OBB with Chrome, Safari, Opera, Brave, etc. You can use your phone iPad and laptop.

There are no plans to make access by other methods possible.

PS I know that most servers run on Linux, so do high-performance machines. Android phones run a form of Linux. OBB can not support it.

 

OBB is still only getting 5% of the readers the old site reported. I never put much faith in the old number.

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Memorial Day (originally known as Decoration Day) is a federal holiday in the United States for honoring and mourning the U.S. military personnel who died while serving in the United States Armed Forces.

Some think it honors active military personnel. Veterans Day is for that purpose.